They’re invading me.

I’m tired.
Looming around me,
waiting for me.
Do something…
anything with it.

Do I just keep them,
closed?
Send them away?
Do I put them in a pile,
light a match?

There are hundreds of books.
Her marks,
writings.
They seem sacred.
What do I do with the things?
Do they contain a piece of her?
Pieces I never knew?
Do I let someone else know them?
Will they be valuable,
to those who discover them?
Are they of value to me?

It feels wrong,
to put them out into the world.
Is it my responsibility,
to read every word?
Is there something there,
that I’m supposed to discover?
What energy do I put,
into looking at her?

If I open a cover,
will I get stuck there?
Will I be able to find my way…
back out?
What if she speaks to me?
What will I do,
with the things she says?
Will they change me?
Do I need to be changed?
Will anyone recognize me,
when I come out the other side?

Will my view,
be completely different?
What new things,
will my eyes see?
What will I not be able…
to un-see?
Am I strong enough to see?
Am I meant to see?

I saw it…
now what do I do with it?
Do I give it to someone else?

I just want to be free.
Free from everything,
that has been placed upon me.
How do I free myself?
I know,
I can’t run away.
Am I allowed…
to free myself?